The Dosquatch Says…

With the help of Weight Watchers, I continue to do my best Wicked Witch of the West impersonation – to wit, “I’m melting! MEELLLLLTTING!” I’m down another 5 lbs from the last weigh-in, for a total of 28.4 lbs I’ve lost so far, and doing so has won me the keychain token seen here. I am currently 303.2, and have about another 5 lbs before I hit 10%. There will be celebration.

I swear to God, if you’d asked me 3 months ago if a stamped washer could cause an emotional response, I’d have laughed.

As it turns out, I did laugh, but not for the same reasons.

Weight Watcher's

Our Weight Watchers meetings are on Monday afternoons. Since yesterday was MLK, we won’t have a meeting this week. Out of a desire for consistency, I rely on only their scales, so no weigh in until next Monday. Instead, I have something far more concrete to celebrate than a number on a scale.

I’m out of notches on my belt.

Since I’ve started this, every so often the pants would slip down just a bit too much and i’d ratchet in another notch. I went to do that this morning, and suddenly found myself on the last hole, in the good direction. And for the first time counted – 5. I’ve come in 5 belt notches, and I have to bunch the waistband of the pants.

And more, I’m completely surprised how big this feels to me.

Yay, me. I feel special today!

Weight Watcher's weight watchers

Over the Christmas holidays, I gained 3.6 lbs in the form of fantastic food with family and friends. I spent the past week returning the gift, and a bit more.

I’m down 4.2 lbsfor the week, for a total so far of 23.4 lbs gone.

Hellz Yeah!

Weight Watcher's

Sadly, everybody’s favorite furry guy packed on some holiday poundage. I’m up 3.6 lbs over two weeks and four large gatherings sitting heavy with deliciously evil culinary offerings.

It could be so much worse.

I feel bad. Not guilty, mind, believe me when I say I enjoyed every last bite. One doesn’t get king sized without a love of food. No, I actually feel the drag on my system from the gain. I knew I was up without stepping on the scales. In fact, based on how I feel, I thought I was going to be up more than that.

But no guilt. I enjoyed family, friends, and food, and I’m still nearly 20 lbs down overall. Back to the routine, back to the declining weigh-ins!

Weight Watcher's

I clock in today at 309 even – that’s 22.8 lbs less of me to love, but 2 years longer to love me if the (unsourced and unreferenced) rule of thumb quoted to me is to be believed… “every pound you are over your ideal weight,” it goes, “is a month off of your life.”

That was a little sobering. Oh, it’s entirely too clean to be scientifically based, but there’s that feeling that it speaks still awful close to the truth.

Worse, I suspect it probably understates the case quite a bit once one tips three digits over. At face value, though, that’s a two year down payment on a decade I’m trying to buy back.

Ka-ching, baby!

Weight Watcher's

There’s been an inconsistency in my Weight Watcher’s weigh-ins over the past couple of weeks that I’m not going to bother detailing… because in the grand scheme it doesn’t matter. Today’s weigh-in is on track again with what it should have been all along.

May I have the envelope, please….. today’s milestone is:

16.8 lbs gone – that’s my 5%! Yay, me.

Weight Watcher's weight watchers

I Beat Anorexia

I would totally wear this shirt! This guy is a minor Hero of the Moment.

I do have a shirt* I wear that has a picture of the chubby Buddha, surrounded by the text “I have the body of a God”.

Fat guys know they’re fat. They don’t so much desire to be fat, but they do tend to have a sense of humor about things.

I’ve taken the opportunity to improve myself. I did not start as round as my fellow Big Ol’ Boy pictured here, and over the past few weeks have shed 13.6lbs thanks to the fine folk at Weight Watchers. Go, me.

* – and I’m gonna keep wearing that shirt no matter how much weight I drop

Navel Gazing, Weight Watcher's funny, picture, snarky

Fat boy’s down 11.2 lbs. Go, me!

Navel Gazing, Weight Watcher's weight watchers

Weight Watchers, 1 week in, and the scales say………

4.4 lbs of furry guy gone (hopefully) forever!

Yay, me.

Weight Watcher's

OK, Boys and Girls, it’s time for Fun With Numbers. Today we’re going to play with Weight Watcher Points. The (patented) formula is more or less approximated as thus:

P = (calories / 50) + (fat grams / 12) – (the greater of (Fiber / 4) or 1)

with P rounded to the nearest point.

The daily allowance of points is based on gender, age, level of activity, girth, pregnant or nursing, and probably another random element or two, with the scale capped at 44 points a day no matter how girthy you might be. If you stick to low-fat, high-fiber foods, you can eat a LOT and still obey the feed limit, by formula.

That’s not what I’m here to talk about today.

Nope, today, we’re going to explore why Americans are blimping up, and I’m going to do it by stepping straight to probably the most egregious single menu item I can possibly come up with off the top of my head:

The Hardee’s Monster Burger. Christ on a Cracker, this thing is just plain evil from a dietetic standpoint…. but damn is it tasty. All 1420 calories, 108g of fat, double-pattied bacon-laden, cheese dripping in a bun bit of it.

And, if you want to plug the pertinent numbers into the formula, you end up with a burger worth 37 points. An entire day’s worth of points, 1 sandwich.

God Bless America.

Weight Watcher's