The Dosquatch Says…

JJ Abrams presents a movie called Star Trek. It’s a bold move, to be sure, and career suicide unless you get it right. Trekkies and Trekkers are downright rabid when you piss in their Wheaties.

So, which is it? Did Abrams get it right, or is it piss flakes for breakfast?

The film is a prequel – it tells the story of how the bridge crew we all know came to be. Rather than be trapped by such mundane details as established canon, Abrams slaps the universe with a big old pile of time-paradoxing angry Romulans to give himself some running room to let established characters have freedom to do new things.

But it’s just not Trek unless they do a lot of the old things, too. Kirk bangs a green chick. Bones quips that he’s just a doctor. Shaun of the Dead is gavin’ ‘er all shays gaht. Spock neck pinches and/or mind melds, depending on which Spock you mean.

Yup, not just new Spock, Nimoy is back. It says something that he was willing to sign on for pointy ears one more time, considering how willing he normally is to turn down projects.

The attempt is to make Trek cool for people who aren’t into Trek, without alienating the loyal fans. So I’ll comment as both.

If this didn’t have the Trek name on it at all, it is a very solid space action flick. The acting is solid, the action is decent, the story coherent, and the visual effects stunning. It hits all the marks one would expect, and hits them well enough not to disappoint.

But it does have the Trek name on it, and on that front – the actors all do fantastic jobs of capturing their characters without making about mimicking the mannerisms of the original actors. Kirk without Shatner… but its still Kirk. Dittos for all of the bridge crew.

The story, while not steeped in the social and human commentary that really makes Trek, it also doesn’t fly in the face of it. It’s not Roddenberry, but it ain’t a bad homage.

I’d like to think Gene would like it, but probably not love it… and it’s good enough I snagged the BluRay. Give it a watch, it’s worth a couple hours of your day.

Geek, movies movies, star trek

I was asked yesterday, “What is your favorite movie?” It’s a simple enough question, I suppose, but I found I didn’t have a ready answer. There are so many great movies, how does one pick?

Then I realized I was being a prat. It happens, even to the furback. The question wasn’t what were the best movies ever, but which ones were my favorites. Excuse me, please, while I self-flagellate…. ah, that’s better.

OK, Casablanca and Lawrence of Arabia, move along. You won’t be needed here. I recognize that these are great movies, but I’ve never yet reached for them “just because.” No, my tastes are my own, and this list doesn’t care if the critics agree or not.

1. The Princess Bride – It’s camp, it’s epic, it’s geek, and it’s very quotable. I can watch it back to back with itself and just not get tired of it. With Cary Elwes, Mandy Patinkin, Billy Crystal, Wallace Shawn, and Christopher Guest in the cast, it just has to be good. And directed by Rob Reiner – this is Meathead at his best.

2. Into the Woods – OK, so it’s not a movie. It’s a stage musical. Singing, dancing, every fairy tale ever, all going on at the same time, “fairy tale ending” at intermission, and real life dirtyness at the end, all tied up with a moral. Again, I just never seem to get tired of it. Sayeth the Prince, “I was raised to be charming, not sincere.”

Yes, I know. Man Card, blah blah blah. Don’t care, those are good flicks. Here, I’ll fix ya up with some explosions.

3. Top Gun – My first “favorite” movie. I watched this and wanted nothing more than to be a fighter pilot. Hot jets, hot chicks, Cruise when he was still “cool”, my man Kilmer, McGillis, Tim Robbins, Tom Skerritt, Meg Ryan, and one of the greatest soundtracks Loggins ever put out.

4. The Matrix – The first one, the cool one, the mindfuck one. Not the crappy sequels. The trip down the rabbit hole, realizing that we’re all actual slaves to the machine. It’s, like, whoa – trippy.

5. Tombstone – A great classic western story, told very, very well by very talented people. “I’m your huckleberry.”

6. Earth Girls are Easy – I cannot begin to tell you how bad this movie is. The story is ridiculous, the premise is retarded, the acting is worse than a high-school production of Little House of Horrors, and I just love every minute of it! This is so bad it doesn’t even rise to the level of campy, but it has (then relatively unknown) Geena Davis, Jim Carrey, Jeff Goldblum, Damon Wayans.

7. Back to the Future – Need I say more?

8. The Breakfast Club and Pump Up the Volume – because at least two teen angst films from a person’s youth are mandatory.

9. Highlander – Don’t lose your head!

10. Die Hard – Yippie-Ki-Aye, motherfucker.

movies

Since I’ve taken the time to throw Travolta under the train, as it were, it seems only fair to give credit to some actors on the other end of the spectrum.

movies

I enjoy movies, but the theater-going experience is just so damned expensive. For the price of one or two people going to a theater, I can wait a bit and buy the DVD. Only, at the rate that movies come out, this too has become quite expensive.

I’ve never been much of a renter, but I’ve recently become a fan of Redbox. Over the past two months my movie consumption has gone up considerably. Somewhere north of 80 movies so far, with no particular regard for age, quality, or genre. Good movies, bad movies, action movies, dramas, chick-flicks, disappointing vanity projects, I’ve watched a little bit of everything.

movies

He is far from alone in this guilt. Many of our best known actors make entire careers in this way. Sean Connery plays Sean Fucking Connery and nothing else. “I’m Sean Connery, you twit,” his presence seems to say, “you’re God damned lucky I signed up for this, now quit bitching about character and roll the cameras!”

movies